Today I won the first ever Daily Show Wing Throwdown. 43 wings in 15 minutes. I believe I edged out the competition using my grit, determination and the distracting power of my Zuba pants. I am champion. I am full. For now.
I don't care what kind of music you make, but I will listen to any demo of any band called "Dick Hammock."2 hours ago
"Boy Sodomizers of America!" This new SNL sketch is hilarious! What? He's a real person? And he's serious? Oh. http://t.co/4DRTRSqvCO3 hours ago
Instead of cats, the Alfs have walking Big Macs as pets that human keeps trying to eat. #ReverseAlf5 hours ago
Hey network execs, I got two words for you: "Reverse Alf." A parallel world full of Alfs, but only one human. Call me.5 hours ago